Obsession (35). September 29 2:59 PM

People! This is bad. Haha. I cannot resist the temptation and here am i... sneaking into the computer room. switch on the computer and start blogging! I did manage to control my craze and stop myself from being "online" on MSN. Haha. I switch my status to "offline". No one can talk to me on msn and this will prevent me from unable to control myself and start hooking on to the computer. Oh FEN BIAN (shit in chinese)! HAHAHAHAAHAHA!!! you won't understand unless you're PRSS 2006 HMT sec. 3 students. HAHA!

Shall make it as short as possible... the S.S. (Short and Sweet)

Hmm, i'll talk about yesterday since it's a lot funNER then today. Well, yesterday i was feeling quite high on my way home, laughing like mad monkeys, unable to stop. Yet, i began to feel SUPER DUPER down right after reaching home. I knew it. I have long know i'll feel so down because i could somehow sense it at the start of the day. Thus, when i alight at Tampines Mrt Station, i went straight to NTUC with shazlin. And i SPEND all my money HAPPILY. I never know spending could De-stress de wor. Haha.

I bought:
Ruffles (original) - $3.20
Lays (Mini-Pack) - $0.60
Green Tea (cheapest) - $0.75
CP Prawn Dumplings - $2.80
Fire Floss (Breadtalk) - $1.40

Total amount spent = 8.75

Wow! I guess this is erpx... haha. I bought all that for my teabreak (considering). Eating so much just for teabreak? Yeah. Haha. I'm super depress, i don't know why.

Once i reach home, i start chewing on the bread. I start gobbling the prawn dumplings. I start gulping down the bottle of green tea. I thought i shall wait for my sister to return before opening up the bags of potato chips. Duh!

I cooked a bowl of instant noodles too. I CANNOT CONTROL MYSELF. Most likely because of the stress i'm experiencing as the examinations day draw near and I'm still not yet prepared for any one of THEM! I'm suffocating, almost dying, but i simply just can't die like that. Weak!

To think i feel so happy before reaching home, and my mood just drop super down after reaching home. Hate myself. Anyway, I eat the packets of potato chips too, with ym sister (of course!). And, an amazing thing happened!

I feel bloated for the rest of the day. However, i still ate my dinner which is a packet of rice. Amazing right? Haha. I can't believe it either. Well, guess determination and mood is essential if you want to eat that much. HAHAHAHAHA~!!! My stomach feel like exploding even when i'm about to turn in. Haha!!! (-The End-)

Last but not least, i'm undergoing extreme stress and pressure... going to turn into fossil fuels if this goes on... and on... and on... and on... Help!!!

Obsession (35) September 23 11.49 AM

I thought i can focus on my Examination and stop blogging BUT due to some unforeseen circumstances i've decided to blog. I know, this blog is too highly-demanded so i have no choice but to agree to my fans' request. Haha. However, i've nothing to talk about recently. Maybe i shall talk about today bah... (sory for any grammar mistakes because i'm falling asleep soon.. pardon me if you guys can't understand... i'm dozing off real soon...)

Finally, i'm able to pass the birthday present to my gor gor. It's like so many weeks le.. HAHA. SUPER BELATED BIRTHDAY PRESENT. I woke up at 9 just to pass him his present and the most pathetic thing is that he came specially down to collect it. HAHAHA!!! Ridiculous. It's the truth anyway. We met at the bus stop right outside my block and he actually called to ask if i wanted breakfast. Nah... before i came down, i saw raw chicken, vegetables and funny funny stuff on the kitchen table so i guess my mummy is going to cook something? My Breakfast? True to say when i reach home, the food was on the table. LOTS of food!! Super Scary. Too Much food. She's like feeding pigs at home can? HAHA. I knew it that's why i don't want breakfast. i mean i told my gor gor i don't want breakfast.

Well, i had a hard time waking up, i jumped when i received the first morning message, read the msg, slpt again! HAHAHA!!! I was suppose to wake up but well you guys shld also know it's hard especially you-know it's saturday. Saturday is a day where you can sleep all the way to late afternoon. Haha. I woke up after receiving the 2nd msg. Duh! Told mummy i'm going down and shoooooo go down. HAHA. I was singing while waiting. And while waiting i was also trying to clear my inbox which was full of precious rubbish. HAHA!!! I'm pretty good at multi-tasking.

AND SOMETHING horrible happened!!! I feel a tap on my shoulder... and i jumped!! How many times must i jump per day? HUNGRY GHOST FESTIVAL JUST END LEH!!! SIA SI WO... if it's someone else, i think that person already fainted. HAHA. Okay i'm trying to tell you guys how courageous i am. HEHE. -) Pass him the present that i was hiding. But he saw it before i manage to pass it to him. SUPER LAO YA SURPRISE. HAIZ...

When he tore the wrapping paper, he was so shocked to see.......................................

A MINI WATER DISPENSER!!!

Hehe.. he told me he wanted to buy that for me too but well, NO NEED LAH i've already received too much presents i'm scared it's some kind of bad omen that i'm going to lose something important in my life. SCARY! Anyway, he's relly lucky because i didn't prank him. HAHA!! Others received something stupid... from bikini, to too-too, to flies swatter, to boxer, to g-string. NOW I'VE RUN OUT OF IDEAS... i was wondering what to get for Anna... *sigh* and december is where MANY of my friends' birthdays fall on. Dead.

Anyway, i ate my breakfast after reaching home and slept until it was 3. HAHAHA this is soooooooo super time-consuming. i just refused to wake up even though i know it's afternoon. i've spent my last week slaving away for my CA leh!! Killing thousands and millions of brain calls every single second. My energy is draining away bits by bits, My big dark eyebags are the scars left behind after slogging and being brutally tortured by tests, tests AND TESTS!!!

But still, life has to continue... Living = hope. -) Sayonara. Oyasumi~ (+nasai LAH BROKEN-JAP!!)

Obsession (34). September 18 3:47 PM

Hmm, I just cooked a pot of porridge and it taste so... DAMN NICE!! *guilty* remember i once made origini/ogirini/ for my Da Sao? The rice i bought, i still haven't used it and now i'm USING IT. Dumb. No one knows about the packet of rice i bought. It's super expensive de because it's Japan rice, rice specially for sushi lah origini/ogirini those kind of japanese food. i think i somehow wasted it. Haha!! It's never a success! My porridge is tasteless. Too Bland. Though i cracked an egg into it but the egg didn't make any effect at all. It just merely look nicer. Worst of all, i don't know whether it's cooked. Haha!! pathetic! Guess i just have to finish it no matter what. Add some light soy sauce and pepper and Whoooooosh~ it will taste nice le, i-guess! It taste a bit gluey? But hard? ALAMAK. i don't know.

Anyway, i'm doing a survey now. It's the Kim sam soon's survey. Super Cute de. Unfortunately, i'm only able to participate half of it. Duh!

What are the 10 things you would like to do with your Bf/Gf?
1. Sing a song together and dance wildly with the music. (Just like idiots!)
2. Have choir practices together. (sing, Sing and SING all day long~)
3. Take turns to piggyback each other (OooHoo~~)
4. Play dance dance revolution and make a fool out of ourselves (in the public!)
5. Go arcade and stalk 'time crisis' or 'the house of the dead' the whole day!! (make others fuming mad because we refused to hand over the machines!)
6. Laugh out loud and ACT CUTE together.
7. Play 'bang bang' on Msn (video conversation).
8. Play Palm War in Snow City (bare-handed... Chilly~ Haha).
9. Go on vacation to... Europe (some countries there) during Winter!
10. Hmm, last one arh? No idea... Ya! Help each other massage~ How cool is that? Super cool bah? I'm having backache now. Seriously need a massage. Haha!! Not bad hor that idea? Then, i'll hop onto his back and use my kung-fu and... *ah-cha-cha~!!* HAHA!! So i have to make sure i slim down first. Dumb.

What are the 10 terms and conditions you will set for your LOVE contract?
1. Cannot meet more than twice a week.
2. Must talk on the phone overnight every two days (at least 3 hours).
3. I'm allowed to slap/box/pinch his nose if he over-act cute. (HAHA!!)
4. If we hang out, we cannot spend more than 20 bucks. (Haha!! I'm seriously broke.)
5. If I call him to sing, he must sing IMMEDIATELY!! (yeah! Sing bah! SING! Don't bother if you can't sing well. Just sing!!)
6. Never be late!! (whaha!! Or else... what? I'm most likely going to whine the whole day i-guess.)
7. Don't treat me like an adult BUT don't treat me like a kid too. ( i just copy this somewhere. Haha! I can't think of any le lah! So, pardon me arh!)
8. Pardon me if i'm too frank sometimes.
9. A granted permission to invade he's privacy (so to be fair, i don't mind him doing the same to me... hah! opening bags and pulling all the stuff out is an enjoyable thing to do.)
10. Never ever scold me in a damn serious way (swear you won't!)

What are the 5 things that you won't feel comfortable to see/hear/meet?
For Kim Sam Soon i know. For me, maybe the same bah? Haha. This is so hard.
1. I'm on a diet BUT he keeps eating infront of me? (This is so 'Sami' lor.)
2. Hmm, him flirting with other girls? (If he dares? *glare*?)
3. Scoldings from him?
4. I want to tell everything to him, but he's trying to tell me everything too. (hmm, meaning... not being a good listener. Bleh!)
5. Never auto-stalk me. (yeah! just recalled a scene from the Kim Sam Soon series. So super funny!!)
Actually, this applies to my everyday life with friends too. So Lame.

There's part II leh but i'm so tired of this survey. See if i want to continue not lah or else this should be the end of it lor. Super Long sia But the questions somehow is similar to the Kim Sam Soon series right? Dumb. Haha. Cute!

Obsession (33). September 16 11:10 PM

Hey! Just did a test! Whooooosh~! Try it out! It's not very accurate anyway.

You are in a deep deep forest... as you walk on you see an old hut out there;

(1) What is the status of the door?
a. Opened
b. Closed

Y2's Answer: Opened door - YOU are a person who is willing to share.

Y2's Comment: I don't know. I don't think i'm that generous to share. I'm just learning to be willing to share. I'm still easily feel jealous sometimes and i'm selfish though not as much as in the past BUT STILL selfish. *sigh*. Thus, this test isn't that accurate.

You enter the hut and see a table;
(2) What is the shape of the table?
(a.Round/Oval / b.Square/Rectangle / c.Triangle)

Y2's Answer: Round/oval - any friends that came along, YOU will accept and trust them completely.

Y2's Comment: Sorry lor. Round and oval table means you're so not innovative and you're very sian keep thinking of the same round table. get it? BUT it's how sad the table i saw in my head was round. Dumb. I hate life without innovation.

On top of the table there is a vase……
(3) With how much water is the vase filled up?
(a.Full / b.Half / c.Empty)

Y2's Answer: Half filled - what YOU want in YOUR life is half still in dreams and fantasies.

Y2's Comment: This one is true. I don't really like reality but i do love reality. It's very mao dun. Sometimes living in dreams and fantasies keeps you going on with your life. That's Life to me.

(4) The vase is made out of?
[a.(Glass/clay/porcelain)
[b.(metal/plastic/wood)

Y2's Answer: glass/clay/porcelain - YOU are weak in YOUR life and tend to be fragile.
Y2's Comment: Most people will of course think of a glass vase when you mention about a vase. Dumb. This is so not accurate can? Who use clay or porcelain vase now? LAME. I'm not weak. In fact, i used to think i'm weak BUT i'm strong. Haha.

You walk out of the hut... and continue your walk in the forest... you see a waterfall a bit far off and deeply observe the water running down...
(5) What is the speed of the water?
(Choose a number ranging from 0 to 4)

Y2's Answer: 4 - gone case!!! super high sex drive!!! Can't live without sex.!AWESOME.!

Y2's Comment: Hmm........................... This is crazy can? Haha. can't live without sex. I can live without sex but i can't live without my voice and music. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! But anyone who reads this is going to think i'm a super bian tai! Ah thank you. welcome. HAHAHAHA. LAME. idiot. *blushed* No skin liao lah.. lian dou dui dao wan liao...

THEN…unknowingly you step on something hard on the ground... and as you look down... you see something glistening-gold...You bend down and pick it up... it is a keychain………....
(6) How many key(s) can you see hanging on the keychain?
(Choose a number ranging from 1 to 3)

Y2's Answer: 3 - YOU have a lot of good friends in YOUR life.

Y2's Comment: i just merely saw 3 keys when it mention about keys... no 1 no 2 just 3... How coincident! Haha. Don't know. Maybe because i love no. 3!!!

You walk on and on... trying to find your way out... and suddenly you see a castle.
(7) What is the condition of the castle?
a. Old
b. New

Y2's Answer: Old - shows that YOUR last relationship is not a good one and is not memorable to YOU.

Y2's Comment: This is so DAMN DAMN NOT accurate can? I'm not even involve in one and how can it says it's not a good one? Want to curse me is it? Bleh! Boo!!

You enter the castle and see a pool of murky water with shining jewels floating on it... (8) Will you pick up the jewels?
(YES/NO)

Y2's Answer: NO - when YOUR partner is around, YOU stick to him/her most of the time.

Y2's Comment: Tell me who will pick up the money when you're in some wonderland. You just too afraid to take anything from the wonderland right? *sigh* Brainless test. (Then what for i still take? GOT NOTHING BETTER TO DO LAH. HAHAHA.)

Next to the murky pool... there's another pool... with clear water and money floating on it...
(9) Will you pick up the money?
(YES/NO)

Y2's Answer: NO - even when YOUR partner is not around, YOU still think of him/her and are loyal to him/her, not flirting around with others.

Y2's Comment: Sorry lor. I'm well known to be a flirt. Maybe to myself. All because of all the rumours lah MADE ME THINK THAT I'm a FLIRT!!! Dumb. Sometimes say i'm with this guy A then next time say i'm with this guy B then next next time say i'm with this guy C and got D and E and F. Wa lao crazy de leh. Stupid rumours~ I feel like a flirt now.

Walking to the end of the castle YOU see an exit... YOU walk out of the castle. Outside there is a big garden…..and YOU see a BOX on the ground.
(10) What is the size of the BOX?
(a. small / b. medium / c. big)

Y2's Answer: small - Low ego.!

Y2's Comment: This is Sooooooo not right. Friends who knows me know that i'm a very very ego person. Hah!

(11) What is the material of the BOX?
a. cardboard/paper/wooden
b. metal

Y2's Answer: cardboard/paper/wooden(non-shining) – humble personality.

Y2's Comment: Please ask friends around me to clarify this. Haha. Take the friends i go out with today (Camilia, Wei Zheng and Shazlin). especially uncle low, he will rebut on this because i'm not a humble person. HAHAHAHAHA!!!

There is a BRIDGE in the garden some distance away from the BOX,
(12) What is the BRIDGE made out of?
(a. metal / b. wooden / c. rattan)

Y2's Answer: wooden bridge - average bond with YOUR friends.

Y2's Comment: I know about the problem too. That's why i'm doing intensive friends-bonding sessions... organising this and that AND MORE DURING THE HOLIDAYS!!!

Across the BRIDGE, there is a HORSE..
(13) What is the colour of the HORSE?
(a. white / b. grey or brown / c. black)

Y2's Answer: white - YOUR partner is pure and good in YOUR heart.

Y2's Comment: HAHAHA really?! Yeah!! I love pure and good BOYS. diaoz... they will only kena bullied by me nia... Whahaha... poor thing...

(14) What is the HORSE doing?
a. still and quiet
b. nibbling grass
c. running about

Y2's Answer: nibbling grass - YOUR partner is a very soft, smooth and humble person.

Y2's Comment: Hmm, Hahaha soft and smooth? Don't tell me my BF gays arh? Or i'm turning into lesbian?!! OH NO!!! Don't want! I LOVE GUYS!!! HAHAHAHA... JJ!!!

OH NO!!! There is a TORNADO coming... some distance from the HORSE. You have 3 options:
a. run and hide in the BOX?
b. run and hide under the BRIDGE?
c. run to the HORSE, jump on and gallop away?

Y2's Answer: c. if you chose the HORSE: YOU seek YOUR partner whenever YOU meet problems.

Y2's Comment: This is so diaoz... you-know-why? my real purpose for riding the horse is to save the horse from the tornado. HAHAHAHHA to think it leads to this... DON't know lah... haha maybe it's true...

Overall: Can you see how unaccurate this test is?!?! HAHAHAHAHA...

Obsession (32). September 16 09:35 PM

Did I tell you guys that if I eat cheesecake, I'll keno diarrhea? OMG!! Very bad lea... Now my stomach is rumbling and stirring like a washing machine. I got a feeling in an hour or two... I'll be visiting the toilet. Home, if I'm not wrong I told Fi Fi about it. Ha.

Today, I keep mixing Cedrick's name with other people's name. I've never feel so disappointed over a friend lor. It's true Lah. When I treated someone a best or close friend and that friend somehow lied or betrayed me. I'll turn into a very EMO person and my brain will... How to say arh? Hmm, cannot really focus on things and stuff. My life will be disrupted and interrupted by the sudden mention of that someone's name (I'm the one mentioning about that someone's name out of the blue. Very dumb.). Very random I know but I just can't help it. Hah!

Don't know Lah.. that feeling - disappointment. I just can't help but feel so sad. I really really love and appreciate friendship. It's not something from the sky. It's not something everyone has. It's very precious. It's very complicated. To ME. Ha.

Anyway, let's talk about something HAPPY instead of that okay? since i've already decided to forget everything in 2 days time. It's too complicated for my brain that I can't differentiate whether I'm wrong or he's wrong. Dumb ME.

Today, I went out of the house at 11.45 AM. I was scared I will take the wrong bus and will end up late. SO I reached Tampines interchange around 12 and scanned through the whole stretch of words on some boards. Ha. Trying to find out which bus will get me to parkway parade. I suck at taking bus. seldom take bus. Bus 291 is the only bus that I know. Ha! Idiot. I remember shazlin told me about what bus 13 or 30 will take me to parkway parade. I thought it's bus 13 so I went searching for bus 13 and I find NONE! Ha. There's no bus 30 either. This cause me to worry and I have to search for help lor.

I boarded the bus at around 12.05 and reached parkway parade at around 1pm. Dumb bus so slow. It's so slow I thought eh? How come so long haven't reach arh? I almost gave up and alight lor because I'm scared I'll really board the wrong bus. I don't dare to call shaz because she got lesson. *sigh* Luckily BUS 31 took me straight to parkway parade. I got 2 assistants what. Ha. The journey to P.P. sucks because I was busy worrying where to alight and shaz called me!! She said alight when there are also many people who are alighting. I just said, "orh". Ha. and camilia told me that she will be waiting for me at the RIGHT bus stop. I was so scared that I won't see her at the bus stop. In the end, I followed the crowd and CAMILIA STILL HAVEN'T REACH!!! Alamak. If I depend on camilia hor, I would have miss the bus stop. Dumb ME.

Shaz was on her way to meet us and camilia and I went to meet uncle LOW first. Nono. He's my baba now. OH NO!!! CANNOT! I got 4 babaS lor in that case? Alamak. Too much. I've already promised not to take in too many babaS. Dumb me. Don't care that one later then settle, I think it will just go according to my plan lor... MY EVIL PLAN. Whaha...

Coffee Bean looked different as what i've imagined. It's situated beside a music CD store. That shop is blowing everyone's ears up with NOISY funny songs which i've never heard before. Yucks! I think my feet stinks lea... wa lao... got odour de. damn it. Okay off topic. Back to the main topic...

I said it's super noisy which somehow disrupts the atmosphere of some ELEGANT-looking coffee place? One step into coffee bean in fact a few metres away from that shop you can smell the FAGRANCE of the coffee. Yucks! Haha. Ha. Then, Uncle Low say why not I tell them to shut it off and camilia said yes I-supposed? And I rebut! yeah! I dare him to tell them to shut it off. Ha I won! silence. Anyway, we just kept talking and talking while waiting for SHAZ. Ha. I told camilia shaz's not angry with her and I guess that makes her happy for the rest of the day!! Owe~~ I'm always doing a good deed. Ah thank you. welcome.

Then we talked about our jobs, cedrick that idiot, the Simpson boxer, 'bang bang' game and singing!! Ha. Always wanted to hear him sing... and dumb. he's never going to sing. Damn it! Anyway, you guys will be surprised that he actually joined in the 'bang bang' game even though it's not even a round. Ha. I'm the one creating topics and camilia's the one explaining one-by-one. Cool... i've never like to explain... because it seems to be a very whinny job which I'll do it only when blogging. I'll only explain when someone maglined me and I have to explain to prevent misunderstandings.

Hmm, what else? Do stupid things, make a fool out of myself and simply go crazy! I'm quite high today for no special reason and camilia said that i'm always HIGH! aiya thank you lah i know i tall right? Har! hmm, i ate pure cheesecake! Yipee!! Haha i've always love PURE cheesecake which my auntie bought or made? Haha. It's super nice because of the cheesy-feel. i don't love spngy cheesecake because it doesn't seems to contain cheese. BUT i hate those square PURE cheese which always make me think of spongebob the lame cartoon character. Those cheese really sucks.

Hmm, i'm learning to eat cheese of course! Haha. But not just eating pure square cheese alone. with bread i can still swollow it down. without bread, i can't do it. camilia had oreo cake? shaz had a blueberry cheesecake. After tasting the two, i still think pure cheesecake is the VERY VERY BEST!! Yipee!! But i'm bloated after eating half of it. Shaz was trying to make me taste coffee and i simply feel like boxing her face. i said, "didn't you read my profile? if someone offers me coffee, i'll glare at that person!" Haha. Then, that idiot uncle Low offer me his cup of coffee. Dumb. Alamak silly lah. It's how obvious that i'm going to reject every single cup of coffee. They just did it out of fun. Bleh! Boo!

Camilia even wanted uncle Low to get me a cup of coffee which is like so... ehem ehem? TOTALLY DISGUSTED. i used to hate even the smell of the coffee and it's how strange i truely deeply madly detedt COFFEE SO DAMN MUCH!! Hmm, shaz and camilie finally talked!!! YAY!!! GOOD TO SEE THAT!!! GLAD TO SEE THAT!! You-know when they are having some sort of cold war i was in between two different groups and i don't know which one to go. Sometimes i follow shaz and sometimes i follow camilia. Haha! Told everyone and grumble to everyone about cedrick!! Haha. Anti-cedrick campaign is going to continue for 2 days! Which is until monday! Duh! Haha.

Camilia said it's impossible for me to ignore someone for hours or days because i'll automatically talk no matter what. WHOA! now i realise how talkative i am. Stupid cedrick will say BMW... ARGH!!! anyway, hehe, i think uncle Low spent quite a lot huh? expensive cakes at expensive-looking place at a expensive mall? Wth am i talking about? it makes me think of the ****ing maids at the ****house with the ****owners!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! this is funny. maybe to myself.

I'm just too high early in the afternoon that my energy level quickly drained off in the late afternoon. Feel so super duper tired. hmm, this is going to be a long entry and i'm glad i went out with them. I know about shaz and camilia and we talk and talk and BOND!! YAY!! LOVE FRIENDS!!

anway, we went to little india with that idiot who slacked and SLACKED!!! Dumbo. Slacker sia... luckily he didn't skip choir practice or else will ruin his image. I've always thought uncle Low is super good at music and LVOE MUSIC!!! And, thus he won't skip choir practices!! YAY!!! HAHAHA... quite disappointed when last time he talked on the phone and i heard him mentioning about skipping choir practice... HAR!!

He brought us to the don't know what mall which looks like sheng siong to me. I'm like going to cheng siong every sunday can? tired of it already. in fact, sick of this place! and i kepy grumbling and whining about going another place because it's so boring. the place is like a supermarket and it's very crowded. Then that uncle low shop for his things you-know?! i buay tahan shopping with adults. remember shopping with my mummy, i grumble and whine ALOT because all the things they buy hor all SO SUPER BORING and doesn't interest me at all. Finally, i saw keyboard and AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAh!!!! I saw my keyboard selling at $280++ !!! YOU KNOW I SPENT LIKE 400 BUCKS ON IT?!?! ARGH!!! ARGH!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAh!!! Suan le. CANNOT!! mentioning about this really pissed me off!!! COOL DOWN MAN RELAX!!!

Okay next, we don't know do what lah then go back we do our own shopping and uncle low went back to work. Never see a slacker like him before... simply tou lan while working... ALAMAK. so daring hor? SO lazy. Hmm, so much thigns happened and we played toys!!! Haha. Very interesting toys but most of the display or free-to-play toys are SPOILT!! DUMB. stil have fun until we reach hmmm, the computer area where only mikes interest me? i wanted to get a mike mah that's why lor. Then we went window shopping for clothes. what sports bra lah t-shirt lah jerseys lah... all those expensive stuff!!!

I seldom go shopping and going shopping is a very tiring thing to do. most of the time, i'll jsut go out to get presents for friends. Like what camilia had said, i seldom go shoping for clothes. No lah i'm changing people! Haha. this coming chinese new year i'm going to dress up like a man and go visiting!!! WhAHAHA i'm sure i'm going to surprise every single one of my relatives!! yeah!! i already targetted on one shop - S&K. MY FAVOURITE!!! Haha.

hmm, out of point again... back to it. Eh? we went back to uncle low and wave to his collegues (is this the right spelling??) then we go buy drinks and then!! Hahaha... uncle low sent us to the nearest mrt station and we wave goodbye to him and we're off to settlers!!! HAHA that place arh... hmmm, it's FUN!!! next time i must bring all my family there PLAY PLAY PLAY!!! HAHAHAA don't care!!! Not my real family lah.. it's impossible because they never will have time for lame games. we merely share time together WATCHING TV!!! HAHAHA but i do enjoy the moments like that because we laugh together, smile together and gan jiong together!!!

Play lots of games and it's how amazing i'm not as lag as i thought i am.. hmm, just saw a lizard creeping past me... SHAZ was the LAGGEST!!! Whoooooosh~! If she reads this... she's going to say 'SHUT UP LAH.' and give that 'duh!' look. HAHAHA. or maybe a smile + starings. HAHAHAHA. anyway, we changed like 1 game every 10 to 15 minutes and i enjoy the stacking game the most. Though i lost but i've always like those stacking games. I love holding the stack of blocks very high and the urge to see it tumbling down every single one of the blocks!!! Whhhooooooosh~ LIKE YOUR STESS!! LAUGHTERS and talkings will come along after the collaspe and that is when someone will grumble about losing the game and someone will laugh at the loser.... KAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Reached home at 8.30 and got a small scolding from mummy. she say how am i going to believe you in the future? i know she didn't mean it, seriously. She got trust in me i'm not going to do that again. Haha. Coz i told her i'm going home at 3-4 o'clock which i thought i will! Hahaha. I thought we can go home after the lunch but shaz wanted to go kar jiao uncle low. Then since quite eaerly too so we join lor...

shall stop here lah since i've finished. EVEN THOUGH NO IN GENERAL... *sigh* my stamina sucks... it's DE-proving (english teacher ms ng said, " NO SUCH WORD." DUH! so random.)

Leaving the life evaluation to another time. Sayonara!
Ciao (oooh! NO!! HAHAHA..)

Obsession (31). September 15 5.05 PM

Today, happy or sad? disappointed or pleased? it's super confusing. My emotions - all mixed up JUST like rojak. Dumb. *sigh a hundred times*

Happy in the sense that the concert went on smoothly... the whole trip was enjoyable and i do learn more about my fellow choir mates. Haha!!! Sad in the sense that tomorrow's class gathering is not going to be a class gathering. It seems more like a friends gathering. 3E7 sucks. I mean it's like no one gives a damn about any gathering. No team spirit. No class spirit. Not even the basic attitude needed for studies. (Our home teachers still thought we're FULL of CLASS SPIRIT. *sigh* in fact, every single soul in our class knows the REAL TRUTH.)

We simply SLACK so much, so many teachers have given up hope on us. I can tell you guys that 3E7 which is known to be the best class is going to disappoint every single one of the teachers in pasir ris secondary school BECAUSE we are going to break the new record!! We're going to get those super lousy results even though we're said to be the best batch of students, in terms of PSLE aggregate. Dumb. 3E6 is better than us, to tell you guys the truth. We're merely a bunch of failures and arrogant punks. We simply suck.

Another thing that involves that dumbo which really brings my day to the lowest point is that DUMBO lor! Haha. Don't know to cry or laugh because i'm confused. I don't know to believe him or to believe myself. I might be wrong. He might be wrong too. I don't know. I'm really really confused now. Can someone please give me some advice? Is he simply fake and stupid? or am i the one thinking too much? Don't know lah. Don't wish to think about it. I shall just forget about the whole incident LOR.

Actually today i wanted to do life evaluation and to talk about something which i simply have forgotten!! Yesterday i wanted to do life evaluation but now... i totally forgot about what i wanted to write yesterday's night!!! Fine! Forget it. I'll blog about that when i remember! Haha. That's all for today. *sigh a thousand times*

Obsession (30). September 12 5.05 PM

I'm HERE TO GRUMBLE and do evaluation. Haha. Basically they are my daily routine. Grumble grumble grumble... and then, you evaluate and you will find yourself learning some things from it. Knowledge not from the textbooks.

Grumble about: Stupid Cedrick.

He's simply so damn LAME lor. He want me to blog standard english for class blog. Dumb S. Haha. (Opps!!) and when i read through what i've read, i find no correction needed. Bleh! I mean just to add excitement and thrill so i did type some singlish LOR. I mean if you're going to blog in standard english, you're going to sound serious and the things i wanted to blog about is some GATHERING leh, hello? Sounds so boring people wouldn't want to go DE LOR. DUMB cedrick. Har!

I did try blogging in standard english the blog before the last (blog) and the effect didn't turn out as what i want! It's too serious people just think it's too boring LAH. CHAR! BTW, my fonts are that big to catch attention! Hahaha. That's an announcement mah so big fonts will attract people's attention... and there will be a higher possibility everybody will read the announcement! Suan le... Stupid cedrick just don't understand. You know lor... His brain... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Okay guess he's going to BAO if i keep insulting him this way... Sumimasen~

Next, Evaluation. Yeah~! Borthday Evaluation! I did a birthday evaluation almost every year BUT this year i'm going to make it a very special birthday evaluation! I do it here - BLOG IT DOWN! Hahaha.

I'm proud to announce Y2 has succeed!! She received 3 birthday testimonial's from her Friends (ah thanks for all those testimonials! Though short BUT sweet! Yikes~ Air-Pee Air-Pee!!).

Testimonial from...
1. Addabelly (bella~! that belly... hahaha... go visit her blog bah... my primary school friends. *muack*)

2. Riena (My cousin's friend. My friend too. We simply chase idol together! Used to lah... in the past!)

3. Cheryl (YEC friend! Yikes~! she knows wor! How nice! HaHA when's hers? I don't know!)


In addition, she also received lots of birthday presents. OMG! Should i list them out one-by-one?

Fine. I shall...

1. Camilia and Anna - a black pencil BAG and colour pens! It's pretty lame when i received it because i wonder why they give me that... but after explaining, i understood le~! it's useful... really! Haha. Erm..., the bad thing is that i'm broke but they still pull me to the cinema to watch movie! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! best birthday ever! Got a surprise birthday! Yeah! Now... i know what to do to them during their birthdays... They're DEAD! Muahahahaha... Arigato!

2. Daniel Gor Gor - This is the best man! Haha... durian puff-like cake and brownies. Hahaha. It's simply so delicious! I was showing off to my sister at home and let her try JUST ONE MOUTH ONLY. Hahaha.BTW, I mean the brownies. I let my mummy and sister have the durian puff-like cake because i simply can't finish it up myself and hmm, i find it quite okay leh. I used to DON'T LIKE those durian puffs or durian cakes or durian mooncakes. Just love pure durian LOR. Now, i know such things are also nice. =) understand?

3. Mummy - A thumbdrive which cost about 80 bucks i-think. Whoa!!! Hahaha... I'm using it now. It's very very Super useful. I stored all the files and photos in and my com don't lag that much now! Yeah! Lame. Actually it didn't make much difference just XING LI ZHUO YONG lor. Hahaha... Anyway, my mummy bought a thumbdrive for me because... My thumbdrive spoilt! Hahaha. Yeah. Aiya it's time to change a new one too. =x

4. OMG Niang Niang Wellie - A stupid pooh-chief. Find it rather useLESS than useful. Haha. At first, i thought he must have bought that because he wanted my to stuff that pooh-chief in my mouth and never to TALK. OR! He just bought that pooh-chief for my Didi. OR! Worst! Simply treating me like a kid! Well, WRONG WRONG! i was wrong he said got meaning de. Whatever it is. It's something got to do with doing a good job as a sister. Meaning he thinks that i'm not a good sister. Haha. I agree. I bullied my siblings! I don't deny!

Yeah! Okay! Thanks alot! I really love my birthday presents BUT i do wish next time there will be a birthday card! Hahaha with loads and loads of words and things about me lor. I just want to know what you guys think of me because i don't really understand myself that much. Sounds so... Yucky! Haha but it's true lah...

Okay next part of evaluation is that... I received... SMSes!!

I received who's birthday greetings first?

Champion - 11:50:47 pm: Daniel Gor Gor (yeah! Of course lah my GOR leh!)

1st runner-up - 11:59:35 pm: Zi Ying (my senior! She still ask whether she's the first one. Duh! Haha!)

2nd runner-up - 12:02:47 am: My Gor Gor! (Haha he blur de lah... know why?)

3rd runner-up - 12:08:37 am: Mr. Xingaporean (ah Xing ah! Haha! Eh? i don't know when's his birthday... shit! must remind me to ask hor!)

4th runner-up - 12:09:43 am: My gor gor again! (Exactly the same message as the previous one... i told you before... he's a BLUR.)

5th runner-up - 12:24:03 am: My Jie Jie! (doesn't read like a birthday greetings but a lovely SMS from her. Hahaha!)

6th runner-up - 12:28:21 am: Ying Hui ( this girl arh! Haha... how she knows my birthday de? I don't know hers lor... i simply have to know her b'day.. HOHOHOHO...)

7th runner-up - 02:35:12 am: Anana silly banana umbrella ("2h 35 min LATE!" that's what she said in the sms. She must have doze off while waiting for the clock to strike 12! Duh!)

8th runner-up - 01:53:56 pm: Cam! *shot shot Kacheek Kacheek!* (Late afternoon. SMS got what wish you loads of fun and laugher in my life de... i mean yup! i do got loads of fun and alaughter because i've been making jokes out of myself... Dumb!)

9th runner-up - 04:27:57 pm: Fi Fi Princess. (haha. I don't even know it's her until she identify herself. Haha. She changed her hp no. which was like so long ago... Aiya! i never update one lah... *excuses* Opps!)

Late comer - 01:30:38 am 4th september!: My Leo Baba. *slap!* (hahaha... yeah i threatened to slap him when i saw him the next time... then he replied my SMS!! Or else, he would only send me that one and only SMS for my birthday. He has gone missing for like 1 month? Duh! And appeared on 4th september. He's blacklisted. Hehe.)

Saw that? Haha this year, I had my best birthday! Haha. Though i had a hard time swallowing my birthday cake my mummy bought, i still appreciate what my friends and family had planned for me. Thus, making the surprise POSSIBLE! Argh!

Oh yeah! Camilia and Zi Ying got a birthday blog for me. Menaing that simply blogged about my birthday LOR! Hahaha... how many people get to have all these during their birthday? I'm the fortunate one! It's ME! ME! Whahahahahahaha!!! Sweet dreams that day... You never know how happy i was!! *smile until my mouth aches* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~~!!! Why am i so blessed? I don't know. *smile again until smile went crooked*. hehe.

Obsession (29). September 11 6.45 PM

Whah!!! Muahahaha *evil grin* Hey guys! i used to blog those long and whiney posts right? Until i bore everyone here. Hahaha! Something new today... I shall now include "the catch!"

So what is the catch for today's post? (Muahaha "the catch" is something i've learnt from those rich tai tai and gong gong.)

The Catch: It's going to be about dreams...

Recently I had 2 dreams which were both so horrifying... I can never forget. Dumb. I used to remember dreams when i find the dream sweet and to my horror... i now find those dreams NO MORE!! Haha, i simply just forgot what happened in those sweet dreams!! Yikes... Kill Me.

Anyway, One of the dreams is about being late and another is about losing my own voice. OMG! OMG! OMG! Never will i want those dreams to come true... Duh! I had those dreams on 9th September '06. Pathetic. 2 nightmares in a day. Why am i always so sway? Dumb.

The First One: Being Late.
It happened like this...
Stil remember I am supposed to be meeting everyone at 2PM at the Tampines Mrt Station on 9th September '06, right? I mean we are going to meet all those 3e7s who are going to join us for the celebration of wei zheng's 25th birthday then we will be off to City Hall to meet wei zheng, right? I actually dreamt about forgotting the celebration and only remembered about it at 9 in the evening. I was like... OH SHIT!!! Dumb Me. I rushed off to take a Taxi and it don't know took me to somewhere near Tampines and City Hall... In that nightmare, city hall and tampines seems to be so close each other. However, I lost my way and had to call for help.

Now recalling it, i find myself dumb. As what shazlin said, even if it's in reality, if you're late for so many hours... don't bother to rush there because 100% plus guarantee no one will be there waiting for you like an idiot. Moreover in my dream, it's already 9 plus. Dumb! Aiya, basically this is the dumbest dream I had ever had.

The Second One: Losing voice.
Urgh~! This dream made me realise how important my voice is to me and i'll take care of it from now onwards...

It happened in yet another weird scenerio where everything seems floating on air and the scenes weren't clear. Everything in a blur and the nightmare is like so damn bloody general as if it was some 5 years old kid who had told me about the story of the dream. Dumb! What the hell am i talking about? haha.

I was having choir practice in that nightmare... I was singing and when i open my mouth and started singing... I was so horrified to learn that my voice had changed... I can no longer sing like what it used to sing in the past. I simply cracked and sang out of tune in every note. Ms Lye was staring at me when i sang like that. I was so worried i started crying. Warm tears came streaming down my cheeks and flood my eyes. I couldn't see anything. I just know i almost fainted when no matter how hard i tried to sing, it just goes OUT OF TUNE so damn badly, i feel lik dying. I want to hide away from this world and never again appear. I find no meaning living in this world without my voice. I realise how important my voice is to me. It's my precious treasure. Dumb. Love My Voice. I can't survive without it. I simply can't!

Obsession (28). September 10 10.25 PM

2 Posts for today because i got nothing better to do! Hahaha... Just now i talked about something very inside of me... now i talked about something very outside of me. Duh! Haha. Hmm, I... okay i'll talked about the conversation between My sister and Me. Haha. It's stupid but well i think i do know a little more about her. Haha simply whining to me about her stuff in school and her tomorrow... Oh God! Haha.

Actually talking about me being the eldest in the family... i'm a failure. Hah! Never once care about them... Yikes! So ashamed. Dumb. Sometimes i just neglected them... VERY OFTEN. Haha. Dumb. Hate Myself.

Okay Okay, back to the conversation... I'm so off topic everytime... we talked about marriage... To think we talked about that in random because we don't want to do homework. Too bored. Haha. Hmm, I hate babies even though I love them. How weird! I love babies when i play with them.. because they are so CUTE!!! I hate babies when they come crawling over me. Dumb. Irritating bunch of cuties. Argh! Like my Didi... future actor... Haha. So fake. Bahaha.

I actually thought of adopting children. HAHAHAHA because giving birth is such painful job. Dumb. Haha okay i will sheng xiao hai if the world change and man is the one giving birth... SO the painful job is given to them... WHAHAHAHA. I think no man in this world is going to want that. They are going to kill me... Hahaha.

Then i told my sister i want my wedding to be held in either April fool's day or halloween's day. It's going to be damn fun de. Hehehe. Imagine we hold a party after that. Party all night. Camp for 3 days 3 nights!! Roaming around streets like what ang moh's country did during halloweens... Yipee! WHOA!!! New! Nice! And, erm... I'm going to find a househusband... and make sure the househusband knows how to cook, do chores and run errands!! Yipee!!! Oh cool~ And i'm going to give him moral support if he's going to give birth.. imagine in the surgery theatre? Push! Harder! yeah! you're going to make it! Haha OMG! How i let my imagination run wild like that?!?! HAHAHA okay it's very funny.. suddenly though of one movie but forgot the title. Dumb.

Hmm, just like the "Armed Reaction IV" the Cheng Feng who's like a super husband... He's able to manage his job and do house chores at the same time! Yipee!! Where can you get such good husband? Duh! Haha. I'm most likely going to be a disappointment who laze and refused to do house work. Whahaha. I rather work! *grin* OMG! I'm dreaming again. Dumb.

My sister also thinks this way. Haha. Lazybums. Haha. The two of us. You can't blame us because we are born from the same parents. Haha. But i don't think my parents are lazy. Haha. Aiya... confused. Enough! My brain cannot take it liao. Goodnight!

Obsession (27). September 10 9.52 PM

Omg! The monster inside me... i can't keep it anymore... I'm going to BAO!!! I find so many faults in me BUT i don't know how to change them... HOW?!?! Sometimes i don't know what i'm thinking but something just holds me back and leave me standing on the same place while others are running or even FLYING to achieve their goals. Dumb. I don't understand myself.

I realise how complex this world can be. I realise that one person can have a thousands faces. They are different when they are with different people. It doesn't applies to some... BUT ALL people in this world. Dumb. Me too. I asked myself many times what in the world is happening to my brain. There are too much information to take in that my brain can't take it anymore and i feel like breaking down. However, i used to thought i'm someone who's fragile and WEAK but i never know i actually have such strong MENTAL POWER! Whoosh~ that keeps me going until today...

Proud of my mind. Haha. Though it process stuff very slowly and can't take in much information at one go... BUT it's so strong that it just won't breakdown very easily... Hehehe. Don't know what i'm talking but well, people do have a thousand faces. Maybe some are too obvious, maybe some just hide those faces... BUT let me tell you... when those ugly faces appear... it means no good. Ugly faces are forever ugly even though we have plastic surgery in the modern days... But you just can't change "ugly faces" that come right from the heart. They are monsters.

Men are forever destructive. They are just a bunch of idiots who thought they are smart but the truth is... they are smart in a stupid way. Dumb. They know clearly that every step they take is leading them to death BUT they just can't help but keep walking to HELL. How Dumb! That's why i have wonders why am i still living here and what is the purpose of being here when one day, we are going to destroy everything here in this planet including ourselves. Dumb Me. Hahahaha.

This world is ugly. Always ugly. Don't grumble and don't rebut. Because you're ugly too. Just think. Use your brain use your brain use your brain arh!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA. Dumb.

Well, Now i only know one thing. That is that ask yourself whether you're happy doing all these... If you're, good! Because to me, staying happy always is the truth of life. You live to experience happiness. You live with your emotions. Smile and always look on the bright side of life. Experience pain and you will experience happiness. Know your objectives in life and don't worry too much, as long as you're walking towards them... you're in the right path. Just keep reminding yourself about your objectives. It helps!

Obsession (26) September 9 10.36 PM

Today's My Gorgor's birthday but i celebrated wei zheng's birthday instead of my gorgor. Funny~ It's very confusing if i explain... you might not even know what i want to explain. Bah! Lame.

And, i'm quite confused. This is how 25 years old this day celebrate their birthday. well basically, we went to watch movie, waited for the birthday MAN (LATE AGAIN, how nice!) and running about looking for toilets without long Quee. How dumb can this be. Hahaha. I'm running like a lunatic searching high and low for TOILETS! Lame.

Watch "The Host" and know what? i don't even know what movie we were watching until the movie started. Dumb. They suggested "The Host". i gave no comment because i don't even know what's that. Until, when i sat down and start focusing my vision on the huge screen... i realised it's the monster film. Haha. Never like action film, though it's funny (i mean "The Host"). I think shazlin and i were stupid enough to be in the cinema. Haha. I bought a bottle of apple juice with aloe vera and how incredible! i actually can survive through the whole movie just by drinking apply juice and chewing on 2 pieces of cookies. Haha. Shaz is a weird girl... she brought tuna and ate tuna in the cinema while watching movie... Hell! Wei Zheng brought chocolate milk (those 1 litre packet chocolate milk) and cookies into the cinema. OMG! What's happening today? i met lots of freaks!

I spent my time closing my eyes and stuff my fingers into my ears to avoid listening and seeing those horrifying scenes. So sudden. Dumb. I don't know why but i love this word now - dumb. Hahaha. Oh ya and shazlin did exactly the same thing. The two of us, we only qualify for comedy. Haha. You know how stressful it is to spent your time worrying about people being eaten up by the creature? I hate worrying for others. And i hate seeing people being gobbled down by the creature ALIVE. Yucks!

Generally, the whole movie is lagging LOR. The daddy is lagging, the military force is lagging, even the monster is lagging. HOW lag. It's lagging more than me can? Haha. I don't lag this way. Haha. Hmm, quite stupid after the movie. i was quite drained out. Oh! It's disappointing you-know? I called, i SMS, i MSN, Haha. i tried all i could but still, i could only get 3 to come. Diaoz. At first, Heidi said she can make it. Tin too. Then in the end, only shaz, fiona and me came. Dumb. Wasted so many SMS this month, i'm going to kill you guys!!! Haha, violent. No lah just have to refrain myself from SMS people this month lor. Haha.

Oh ya. Whaha. You-know-what? That qian bian guy came late again. i remembered he told me it's 4 PM then he denied and said it's 5. Okay lor take it that we will be meeting at 5 BUT he's still LATE. Hello? He reached at 5.45PM. Mr. Late. EVERYTIME hor. He's never punctual de leh. Trust him to be a Man. I thought that only happen to girls. Alamak.

OMG! I don't want to talk about it anymore. Okay lor basically QUITE fun lah. I never know i can watch 2 movies within a week. Haha It never happens de leh. I'm always lagging so much. The Most i can watched 1 movie every half a year. Haha. Quite pathetic but well, first i'm broke (always) and second, i don't find anytime for movies. Haha.

Wei Zheng's birthday present was a boxer by the way. I gave it to him in a plastic bag which he refused to take it first but i don't care. Haha. I should have put it in a lok kok plastic bag those market red plastic bag... Haha he's going to feel so dumb and embarass carrying it. Why didnt i think of it earlier? DUmb. It's super cute can, the boxer. Hahahaha. I'm running out of ideas, now i don't know what to get for people's birthday. Duh! He's going to wear it this saturday. Hahaha. Who's so sporty? I doubt Joel wear the G-strong like underwear. Hahahahaha. Hell~ Hope he really will be wearing it lor. Bahahaha. He a bit speechless when he saw what's in that blur king box. Haha. Well, Blur King box because he's very blur too. Shaz ask why a blur king box and i answered, " It's because during the band concert, he can actually tell me that he almost went back home if i didn't remind him that there was a band concert that day." Duh! Hahaha. Oh ya! He said okay hor... When i said you wear it this saturday ah, he said okay hor. So, everyone, you're my witness arh... HAHAHA... Going to do a check. (Opps! Haha. No lah... i got my way to check de... i don't have to conduct the check myself...)

Enough of Wei Zheng though he's the birthday Man. He's already the headline (as you can see...) haha.

Now, I'm so stressed about my studies. I may look okay but i'm not. Haha. It's................. haha. Don't wish to talk about it suddenly.

Hmm, haha, talk about yesterday then. I MET MY PRIMARY SCHOOL TEACHER MRS HO YESTERDAY PEOPLE!!! OMG OMG OMG!! MISS HER AND EVERYONE (my primary schoolmates). Haha. I saw her daughter and i was glad she actually click quite well with me. HAHAHA!! There were 17 of us and it was how amazing we actually managed to gather 17 people in two hours' time. We somehow lose contact with each other so this is consider a... mission impossible. BUT WE MADE IT POSSIBLE though i'm not the one contacting others. Bah!

Mrs Ho's pocket must have a hole because we spent like 100++ bucks on ice cream. Haha. Rich hor. We agreed to meet up again during december holiday at her HOUSE. Whaha. She suggested that and i'll make sure... i... actually.... ransacked her house... HAHAHAHAHA... okay dumb. what a word to use. Mrs Ho slim down a lot and I MUST ALSO GO ON INTENSIVE DIETING TO MAKE SURE I DON'T LOSE OUT. HAHAHA. just kidding. slowly lah. Haha. Start on food first. Don't eat will make sure i don't gain weight and that i don't use money. Actually can save and diet at the same time HOR. Not bad. Haha.

Target 1: I want to stop stuttering. Damn it. I'm always stuttering regardless whether i speak chinese or english. What's happening to my tongue? Haha.

Target 2: slowly lah... start on target 1 first. Boo-Hoo!!!

-END- burning midnight oil tonight! Yipee!!!

P.S. Find Fiona very sensitive today. Is it i'm the one who's sensitive or her? Damn i'm lost and confused. You-know? I'm so infuriated by some people's behaviour and attitude and i'm feeling so frustrated over it. I'm going mad. And because of them, I'm becoming a freak... i'm getting more and more sensitive to some topics and issue nowadays... I'm going to learn to forget about all these and return back to normal. I don't wnt sensitive Y2. Whaha. SO get lost please! Pissed off~ Argh! Can't be bothered.

Last but not least, I LOVE SHAZLIN!!! OMG i'm turning into a lesbian. Hahaha. Must be firm. I'm just a pro-lesbian. Hahaha. Duh!

And, ALAMAKA i don't think he regard me as his sister!!! MAMAMA. Don't care i must ask him again. I WANT 2 GOR GORs!!! future jie jie is coming up... hehehe... only if she quits smoking. Dumb. And, my family will be complete with me the youngest! arh thank you. welcome. MORE MORE PAMPERINGS!

Obsession (25). September 7 8.56 PM

Yikes... This is really great. I'm really really broke because i'm no longer given allowance. Haha. Maybe when school starts mummy will starts giving my allowance. *sigh* She finds me spending too much recently and what does she knows? People oweing me money, not returning. I'm really broke and so people stop asking me to help you pay first and that you will pay me later. Erm... hello? Most likely, 80% you are going to forget and that's it. Haha.

I don't mind it at all you-know? But that only applies when i got money... But now i'm facing financial crisis, i'm skipping my breakfast and lunch and eating dinner at home just to hope that i can save a bit here and there enough to BUY... XXXXXXX (something) haha. Shh...

Well, i hope all these sacrifice will be appreciated. Haha. And, okay lah don't have to be appreciated... Just have to love what i buy can le... HAHAHA. Now, i'm bloated. I just finished a packet of chicken rice. Haha. It's a very big packet you-know? haha Oh No! i'm just dreaming... it's not yet finished. DAmN it. Haha.

Now, i'm eating while doing some research. Just doing some medical reasearch. It's very challenging huh. haha. i can't figure out all the terms and what i want to find isn't there... DAMN. Today is such a smooth day. (*sacarstic + fake*)

and.. i'm lazy to type now... life is getting more and more tiring every single day................................... i'm tired and lost. i'm almost up to the point of................................ NO! NEVER!

Obsession (24). September 6 8.11 PM

Do you guys realise that i have not been blogging about the M.B.? Haha. I told you i'm having many many internal struggles recently. One of them would be the M.B. i wanted so much to blog down what had happened but i couldn't bear to do it. I need time to settle down i-guess. Haha. They are a bunch of people who have leave a very huge impact on me. Haha. Take it slowly... I shall blog about something else instead.

Maybe just 2 things which would make today's entry a very long one.

First, My Job

Second, My Choir

We left biology remedial early today because we (we meaning camilia, cedrick and i) have to attend the super memory workshop at a whatever hotel. That WORKSHOP was GREAT! (HAHAHAHA. I'm such a good liar.) Well, i don't mind telling the truth. The truth is we didn't go for any workshop. We just come up with an excuse to leave early so that we can reach Henderson in time. We are going for trainings. I don't deny the fact that i did learn something BUT i could say that it's really tough. My legs were aching at the end of the day and i could barely think of anything except the F word. Cedrickk and camilia would know what i'm talking about BECAUSE our B.O.S.S.E.S JUST KEPT SAYING THE F-WORD. Damn it.

At first, i realise that one of them smokes. In the end, i found out that out of the 3, 2 smoke! I'm going nuts and i'm not sure if the last one smokes because at this pint of time, he didn't CHEW on any of the CANCER CELLS. haha.Secondly, They just kept saying the F word in every sentences. I mean OMG this is really bad you-know? Singaporean aren't suppose to say the F word so often. They are really teaching us bad things and when i found out that the two B.O.S.S.E.S who smoke actually said the F word, i was praying very hard, hoping that Mr. Albert will not say the F word. He gave us an impression that he's the best of the 3 BUT surprisingly cedrickk caught him red-handed. MAMA. Is it confusing?

He didn't say that very often just twice which is already bad enough BUT the other two were worst. They said things such as "F***ing maids in the F***ing house with the F***ing owners?" let me tell you... I want to stay as innocent as i can be and I DON'T WANT TO BE INFLUENCE BY THEM and start saying the F word in every sentence. DARN IT!

I think Albert was kena influence by the other 2 thus he said the F word SO cedrick and i were thinking maybe we can change him and make him stop F***ing. Hahaha. Cedrickk actually said we might kena influnce by him before we could change him. I agree. Haha. Many things happened and i learnt quite a lot today. NOT THE F WORD. Haha. It's something you can learn only when you work. You can't learn anything like that in school. Haha. That's the best thing about taking up jobs.

I stutter. I stutter. I stutter. I stutter. I stutter. basically, i stutter ALOT. OMG! Best thing in life, I earned one apppointment! It was great you-know? The sense of achievement is there! haha. After all the hardwork. The walkings. The talkings. I feel so pleased with my appointment. Haha. We meet people with different FACES. haha. I talked to ang mohs and sad to say most of them were moving soon thus we can't manage to get appointments from them. Somehow at the end of the day, i pick up the skill of communication. I somehow catch what i have to say and what i GOT to say. Doing reflection while sleeping and tomorrow will be another FUN day. har!

It's hard to work BUT you feel good having to work. haha. I just hope we get to stick with Albert instead of the other 2 F guys. HAhaha. I couldn't bear to stay with them for another minute. Bad influence. Haha. Well, hmm, i guess. The Mario guy is very quick-witted but the way he do business is somehow NOT very proper... TO me and cedrickk lah. Maybe the others think differently. Albert does his business in a more proper way. Haha. Our definition of Proper will be different lah so it's not personal attacks. Haha. Erm... but the two of them are understanding in the sense that they know we got schoolwork and have to school thus the working hours are flexible. Haha.

Erm... Oh ya... something funny, we actually teached 2 temasek poly students whom we know through the company the 'bang bang' game. Duh! Haha but we didn't get to play in proper. duh! Oh ya and we offered to help wash albert's car not for free because his car is damn... DIRTY WITH bird shits here and there stciking on the wondows. Hahaha!!! OMG! SO FUNNY CAN i cannot stop laughing when i saw the state of the car. HAHAHA. Luckily it's not my daddy's car. And he's a very blur person. He can forgot where he put his stuff in a minute time. HAHAHAHAHA. Overall it was a nice experience but i just don't like smoking bosses who kept saying the F word. Smoking is already very bad... Saying the F word is worst. Duh! *Sigh*

Oh and one last thing, camilia, cedrick and i went around the private estates and we start asking the people for free drinks because we were so thirsty. Cool huh? The first time we got ourselves APPLE JUICE! We expected something nice or nicer the second time BUT we got newater instead. We laughed because we expect to get drinks like apple juice or something nicer. Third time we got plain water!!! HAHAHAHA it was damn funny can? HAHAHA aiya i don't know how to make it sounds funny BUT if you were with us YOU WON'T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE IT'S REALLY FUNNY. The 3rd time was the worst and we can't reject the drinks right? So we accepted the plain water but i only asked for half a glass of plain water and camilia a full glass!!! THIS BEN DAN!!! HAHAHAHA. BUAY TAHAN. i can't finish mine because i was laughing. HAHAHA we just hope to get packet drinks NOT plain water but we got it and camilia was so stupid to have drank a full glass of plain water. HAHAHAHA.
---------------------------------------------------------

Now is choir... shit what i want to talk about huh? Eh... let me think hor and i shall blog the other day le... WHAHAHAHA... I remember it's about internal struggles... *sigh* a long journey for me....... to finish.... LONG LONG...

Since i somehow remember what i wanted to talk about (at least the beginning), i shall blog it now to prevent that piece of information from slipping off my mind again.

So, i shall talk about the three english songs that will cause me to be a SUPER DUPER EMO PERSON. haha. The first one would be Michael jackson's "you are not alone". The second one would be Avril lagvine's "nobody's home" and the third one would be Savage garden's "truely madly deeply" Haha. It was how funny my emotion will shoooooooo~ go sinking down real fast and shooooooo~ rise up high again... until my heart shakes and my vision starts blurring everything that lies before me... (no tears i must say...) but i'm always very absorbed into the songs and i got the urge to SING the songs OUT... very loud and very clear... and VERY WELL VERY WELL UNTIL i'm feel pleased with my singing...

MUhahahaha... but environment doesn't permits... people will think i'm mad... so usually i do it in the lift or at home's toilet where no one is in the house... When I'm alone... my body moves to the music so smoothly and naturally without having to be afraid someone might just catch what i'm doing and start laughing... i got the URGE to not dance but do those very stupid action... HAHAHA... and i think it's good to show it to myself but not to the public or anybody else...

And it's how strange when i happened to change the song a little here and there naturally without myself knowing until when i sing with the vocal and realise that i changed some of the parts and it sound different from the original. Most of the time, i think the song sound nicer with the changes. Maybe only to myself... BUT I JUST LOVE THE CHANGES. haha and i think singing to myself is a very pleasing thing to do. self-entertaining... Haha but my singing techniques and singing style still needs improvement. I want it to be more steady and firm like my Pro but i want my sing style to remain... the R&B way... WONDERFUL!!! This is when i really love myself alot... when i'm totally into music... It's music that makes me love myself. Har! Caught myself red-handed! Yay! Haha. Haiya i understand can le... Whahaha.

So, i share with you the song NOW...

Provided By MetroLyrics

Provided By MetroLyrics

Obsession (23). September 6 11.59 PM

Before i forgot, I must first write down about MY HOPES:

(I hope I'm not being too demanding or amibtious because after thinking back about the current situation choir is facing... i do have doubts... i'm just being frank.)

I Hope That Choir Will Become a CCA whereby everyone will have an instant recognition when they talk about Pasir Ris Secondary School. (Wow! That would be great! It means popularity level going UP!)

I Hope That Choir Will NOT be JUST a CCA but a group of singers who stay united and reach their goals together as ONE BIG FAMILY. (Just Imagine! *smile*)

I Hope That Choir Will Become a CCA that is so strongly united, the individuals in choir will remember that they are not alone and they have got the whole choir with them, to give them motivation and moral support in whatever they do. (E.g. You might think you look stupid Having to dance during some performances, but remember that you have the whole choir looking stupid with you. HAHAHA!)

I Hope That Choir Will Become a CCA whereby when choir members graduated, they will still be coming back willingly to help the choir, to share their experiences with the juniors. =) (What a good thing!)

Choir needs to improve on their attitude. People have to be consistent and committed to their CCA (by attending choir practices regularly) and learn how to love their CCA. In order to stay committed, you have to learn to accept and love IT. That is what that has kept me going. You can always apply it to other things in life.

Oh ya! i'm still learning to love and accept many many things in life. So, let's all learn together. It's not going to be easy BUT once you have a start, everything will goes smoothly. You just need a start! Believe ME. Haha.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today, I had fun. I did learn some things BUT i expected to learn more things from the camp. Haha. I was really... Haha. Nevermind. And Today, i have many many internal struggles during the one day choir camp. It was horrible and I just somehow lost focus. Luckily i wasn't caught dazing or whatever i've been doing. Haha. It's hard to NOT show your feelings. Haha. I simply can't. I trying, haha, i need to.

I was mumbling to myself and to Shazlin that i wanted the Pro to teach during the sectional tranings we had, in the end, i did got the Pro but it's somehow so disappointing i actually feel that maybe if it's someone else, it could be better. Haha. I'm mean but i just need to whine about it here. haha. The Pro did taught us some things BUT sad to say, most of us either learn it before or we already know the "things" that the Pro has taught us. What i want is NEW things. haha. Nevermind.

I mean the starting of the camp was somehow disappointed which resulted in me thinking that the whole thing will be as bad as THE BEGINNING but well, it's still not as bad as what i've thought.

Hmm, after much thinking the reasons for all these disappointment is due to lack of preparation. Haha. My First impression of the Pro is that she is a very good leader. I find her firm yet approachable. I mean this is very challenging you-know? And, when i see her conducting her sectionals with her section, i could feel the POWER you got it? I don't know how to explain but you have this feeling that this section is training very hard and they will be singing very well for sure. This actually makes me wanted to learn from her and i actually wanted to be in her section to learn and feel the power. It's how amazing she had affected me so easily even though i had only know her for not too long AND that she stepped down not long after. A very very very big impact. Powerful.

Thus, when i heard that she would be coming for this camp and will be teaching us, i was really excited and got myself prepared to learn from her and absorbed all the knowledge that she's going to teach us. I wanted to feel the power. I wanted to actually feel the power as a member in her section. I guess the feeling would be totally different from just observing. You got a chance to be involved. Yay! i was really really looking forward. You understand how i feel?

Maybe she didn't have the time to preapre.. NONONO... is definitely she doesn't have time to prepare the sectional trainings. I mean before sectionals, it's very important to prepare beforehand and she only got the scores ON THAT DAY (which is today). haha. Duh! That is why the main thing that have cause the disappointment in me is the lack of preparation. Everyone makes mistakes and i can't expect everyone to be perfect because NOTHING IS EVER PERFECT even robots can't do that! Haha.

Climax of the whole camp was most probably the concert that is held at the end of the camp. I have to explain, even though i did perform on stage BUT i was with CHOIR. i have the whole choir there on stage with me. When i was singing during the MINI MINI MINI concert, i was ALONE. And, i have stage fright. Yes yes.. many is going to laugh and question me... "are you kidding me? i thought you did perform on stage before? and why didn't you seem to have stage fright when you were performing on stage?" i have already explained, so just read the whole of this paragraph AGAIN if you want to understand.

Do you know what stage fright means? The symptoms are mostly the same right? To me, my legs tend to turn jelly and start shaking uncontrollably. My palm turns cold with sweat. My vision tends to move around ON THE FLOOR and not the audience. Once i settled down, my vision can focus more LOR but that only happens after a few minutes. Anyway, when making a speech, it's even worst BECAUSE i just blurt out RUBBISH without even scanning it through my brain. i talked nonscence. i faked smile. i tremble. my back sweat. i couldn't think. That's why it's not wise to let me speak to a big group of people SERIOUSLY..

yap! So, when you have to choose someone to talk about something serious, you can't choose me. I'm not the ideal person. Giving instructions? i can do it! A talk? forget it! Haha. I can conduct a talk. i can! You have to give me a very long time to prepare before i can go up on stage to talk to everyone because my brain cannot process information fast. IT LAGS, PEOPLE!!! So, please be reminded that Y2's brain lags very often. Haha.

Obsession (22). September 4 09.04 PM

First of all, i would like to thank my GORGOR for contributing to my such-a-wonderful-day TODAY. (just now.)

Sounds werid but well, haha take it that i'm acting cute (cedrick would say that, camilia would laugh, shaz would say, "lame", Anna won't read it today cause she has got dates with her class. FINE. haha.) Okay. But i was very glad because I wasn't caught by boboneo. Hehe. i didn't finish the HW she wanted us to do. I was late for Chemistry remedial and i wasn't scolded by Mrs Chua. I managed to buy a bottle of green tea before attneding the chemistry remedial. I didn't alight at Eunos (whatever you spell it.) Haha. i remember many times when i was late, i was so in-a-rush i actually alighted at Eunos instead of bedok. Stupid. Haha. i'm calling my sec. 3s now so... Yupe... blogging later. Goodbye.

Obsession (21). September 2 08.19 PM

Hehe. Today, i would like to thank...

ANNA AND CAMILIA, CAMILIA AND ANNA!!!!!!!!

Especially thankful to Y2 for making today possible...

Hehe. I don't wish to explain but well just a brief summary of what happened today...

I was told that we got work (JOBS) today and we have to meet at 12.30, Tampines Mrt Station. Before i reach there, i SMS camilia and cedrick so as to ensure that both of them are on their way there and WE WON'T BE LATE THE SECOND time. However, ther's some misunderstanding so aiya i can't be bothered to explain. Haha. I reached Mrt Station. Find no one. Start calling camilia... Then, Camilia and Anna just *POP* out infront of me all of a sudden and give me a shock of my life.

Haha. I was lagging a bit before knowing THE TRUTH. Haha. They lied. There's no such thing as work today. It's meant to be a cover. It's a surprise!!! Yeah! So cool Haha. we go watch movie then buy lots of things. I'm already broke lor. haiz... Haha. Not to worry. Haha. Oh ya! we watched the "devil whatever prada" movie... ZOkay dumb me... i asked them a lot of times the title of the movie but i just kept forgetting it. It's a very nice show. I've learn something from it. And see my own shadow on the two main actresses. Haha. Not going to explain it because it's going to be very lengthy with all the explanations.

ANYWAY i manage to see something i would like my gor gor to have it so yah.. that's good.. i'm still worrying about what to get for them for their birthday. Both in september you-know? haha.

I spent alot today, base on my financial state. I owe the two of them about 15 bucks today. haha. Cool lor hope my mummy will give me $$ or else i don't know what to do le... *sigh*. Anyway, it's okay lah. THANKS THE TWO BEN DAN for spending their day with ME. it's been quite some time since the 3 of us went out together. haha. pathetic. Well, basically we finally got time to TALK TALK TALK though not a lot but base on the time we could spare, it's very enough. Haha Very.

They bought me something CooL. haha. I'm going to buy a book and ask friends to write about me on that book using the pens they bought for me. Hehehe. And, i'm going to fill up the pencil case with new pens and stationeries. Muahahaha. And, ONE MORE THING! Shaz say she's going to give me my birthday present on Monday. OMG! And, Mr. Xingaporean is going to pass me mine the next YEC meeting. OMG! This year is such a cool year... I'm receiving so much presents!!! yay! Oh and Monday, my gor gor is going to celebrate my birthday with me. Okay haha guess i'm so blessed.

Just one more thing... i wonder what my mummy will buy for me this year... she bought me a MP3 last year because i did quite well last year in terms of my results... this year i slack like shit can? Sure is something Lame. I just hope she will give me one red packet containing 100 bucks. I'll kiss her on her cheeks and say a hundred times "I LOVE YOU, MUMMY~!!" haha. OMG so materialistic and realistic (in a bad way). bleh!

Thank you. Thank you. haha. i shall change "welcome" to "thank you" instead. Haha.

Obsession (20). September 1 02.31 PM

You've reached Obsession (20). Congratulations! let's us all celebrate! Haha.

It has been a rather depressing week for me. i just wonder why i'm feeling this way. Haha. I was racking my brain over this question, trying get myself out of this "uneasyness'. However, this seems to be mission impossible. Whatever it is. No matter how much brain cells this question has used, this piece of puzzle remains a mystery - unsolve.

It's the first time i'm overwhelmed by this strong sense of depression where your system can't focus even when i'm listening to music, I just Can't FOCUS! This is ridiculous. something is bothering me and i just can't figure out what's that. maybe there's only one or maybe there are more than one. I just know one thing. That it is disturbing, interrupting my normal carefree life. I could still smile. i could still laugh BUT i hold back my laughter and smile, it's no longer as CAREFREE as it's used to be. there's something wrong with me. there is.

Searching for an answer... wait let me breakdown first. I've been having frequent small breakdowns recently BUT don't worry it's SMALL so it means no tears involved. Haha. People who know me should know what i'll be doing during my breakdowns yeah? Haha. It only applies to small breakdowns. SUPER BIG ones... i've never been through those before... maybe in the future. Haha. I'll continue blogging later on, yeah? OKAY!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Enough of breaking downs. haha. It's 11.48 PM. I'm feeling very sick here (*pointing to my head). It's stinging pain. It's so painful, i feel like driving a hole at the side, and dig all the screwed materials, 'wires', troubles, stress, problems and brain cells OUT OF MY HEAD. It's driving me crazy and without the brain cells, maybe life will be simpler. Sometimes, thinking can cause so much headaches. I'm suffocating.

Not only my head aches, my heart aches too. I just talk to Cedric and we talk about friendship. Sometimes, we do feel that some of our friends take us for granted. Also, they don't really appreciate what we've done for them (you might be wondering whether it's you, so hmm, don't think too much.) Haha. I'm very disappointed over myself for being such a failure when it comes to handling frienships, kinships and aiya... just all the relationships. They are too abstract to be understood. I don't know how many braincells i've killed just to try figure this abstract ART. haha.

Yup. i feel like failure. My life dangling here and there like a loose, old and useless wire, abandoned by the world, thrown into some garbage chute and buried forever deep underground with no chance to see the sky. Reminder: In the Past, They are no such thing as 'reuse', 'reduce' and 'recycle' that's why old wires have no chance of being recycled. understand? haha. what a lame joke (*freeze*)

Due to time constraints i've been neglecting alot of things lately and after much reflections, i've come into a conclusion. Y2 is 100% plus guarantee WEAK IN TIME MANAGEMENT which has resulted in her reduced to such a pathetic state. Being a failure in almost everything she did. Maybe you gus think i'm too over-exergerate thigns but please be aware you don't know the full story... thank you. welcome.

Just to tell you guys that i dreamt about my leo baba last night. Haha. Crazy but true. It's about him calling me after his return from Thailand. Lame. Haha and i scolded him in the dream because his birthday present is still with me. duh! Anyway, the truth is that he's still missing and he's WANTED. He better do something before i BAO and disown him. har! I know it's very unfilial to do this but he left me with no choice.

Bleh! I'm just so petty. Just say all you want. My decision will not change de! He's sinful. har! Don't friend him le... Hahaha. he used to say that lah but i just talk back by saying... "friend what friend. i'm your daughter leh, not your friend." yeah. I'm such a pro, right? haha. Smart. But well, i heard that he will be back the end of August but now it's already 1st of September lor.

And SHIT, I heard from my mummy that there were a series of XXXXXXXXXX attacks in Thailand (Possible not not confirm... she say... haha. so unclear. she say maybe because XXX 3rd or 4th anniversary is near.). Wonder whether it's true not. haha. Hope not okay? Because my Leo Baba might still be there... CHOY AH!!! Haha. Good Luck to Leo Baba.

I think it's time for me to learn more time management skill and shower more care and concern TO ALL MY FELLOW FRIENDS, CLASSMATES, SCHOOLMATES, TEAHCERS, FAMILIES, CHOIR MATES AND PEOPLE WHOM I KNOW. Just want to say, "I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART". really. it comes from my heart. i really love all my friends and family and without you, i doubt i can survive.

Living alone in this world is such a sad thing in life. i rather die than to live alone. i swear. imagine. it's even worst then going to hell. At least in hell, you can take hardships together with many others with you... there's no such thing as a hell without anyone inside? whatever i want to convey is very clear. haha. can you feel what i'm feeling?

My friends and family are just like a key to my life box. They open the box and add little (bits by bits) yet precious memories into the box, uncovering the true personality of Y2. She's not yet completed, other than herself, she needs her friends and family to join in the journey, to assist her to excel in her life. The box will close one day by the tears of her family and friends and will be keep in the lengendary world, filling yet another space on the Earth. She might be only a person, but she makes a difference.

I do want my existence in this world a lengendary one which will be the one like Walt Disney. He created wonderful dreams for the children. He has make all children in the world, having the same dream and belief. Yay! i'm so touched.

Just want to say i wish that my presence will bring hope to people lor. Just like Walt Disney's creation which has enables people of different age to fantasize. Even when they're a 100 years old, Walt Disney's creation has... how do i put it in words? haha... i don't know how to express myself but Walt Disney's creation has make a very big impact on me. A world of fantasy. Even though i fantasize but i'm still able to go back to reality. This is the power of Walt Disney. He's really awesome. haha. He has earn my respect. Hehe. My persue in being Imaginative and Innovative actually begins after really UNDERSTANDING Walt Disney's work. CooL.